tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-80194176414070754622011-07-08T08:10:28.308-07:00Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.comBlogger391100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-61463235048236329632009-10-27T09:04:00.000-07:002009-10-27T09:13:03.063-07:00

I've been a blogger for about 2 years. I have a total of 3 blogs (one personal, one situation specific, and this one... which is everything I feel the need to say but don't have a place to say it). I guess I've done pretty well making it this far without any negative blogging experiences. But that's over now. I got a little too free with a comment on another blog and another commenter

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-73156336561463980352009-10-06T08:11:00.000-07:002009-10-06T08:17:45.305-07:00

What do you say when your mother comes to your house...With a freaking WIG on....And wants your opinion???Holy mother...I've never been so grateful for the openness and tacklessness of children. Mine laughed at her and I could feign shock and embarassement at their behavior..."I'm having it styled tomorrow, what should I tell her to do with it?""Tell her your daughter said to make it look less

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-66048314215018189362009-08-18T07:48:00.001-07:002009-08-18T07:53:25.392-07:00

Excuse my embarrassing fan girl moment while I look at some stills I captured from the most recent New Moon trailer.*Squeal*

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-67740400483696365722009-08-03T10:40:00.000-07:002009-08-03T10:53:39.399-07:00

Hubby and I are on-site managers of a 40 unit apartment complex. Besides contract signing and rent collection it is basically a big baby sitting gig. Hubby is good at it and all the ladies like him and chat his ear off any time he tries to take the trash out or get something from the car. Sometimes it bugs me that he is so helpful. I come home from a 10 hour day and want to sit and talk with

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-64921736708202109762009-07-09T08:25:00.000-07:002009-07-23T10:01:48.721-07:00

1. When the receptionist comes into work late and giving me random excuses that I know are lies I picture myself holding an open flame next to her brittle, badly highlighted hair.2. I left in a rush today and forgot to brush my teeth. The gum is not working well enough.3. I think Jimmy Fallon is sexier than Brad Pitt.4. Hubby and I didn't use very good judgement this week and now I have to go

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-74128237089814137502009-07-06T14:16:00.000-07:002009-07-06T14:27:02.618-07:00

In an attempt to amuse you I was prepared to write a big long funny narrative that ended in my most recent failed attempt at a new job.  But in the end I'm just to bummed to do it.  I think list form works best...- 3 phone interviews- 1 flight out of state for in person interview- 3 hours of testing- candidates narrowed from 100 to 3- dreams crushed with one simple email, "thanks but no

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-82538392181133229042009-07-02T10:26:00.000-07:002009-07-02T10:35:34.442-07:00

Instant messaging is a wonderful thing.  It provides an opportunity for serious and meaningful discussions between siblings... like the one I had today with by brother "Bob".  Behold...8:23 AM Bob: People are so stupid. I always send proofs to people and ask them to pick which one they like best. The would respond in 'I like the green one'. Well hell! there's three options with green! so I

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-21377356292552571532009-06-25T06:47:00.000-07:002009-06-25T06:59:02.417-07:00

Here are two posters for New Moon. Can you say "hummanna?" Now, I am a die hard Edward fan and have grown to like Robbie boy but (and excuse my french) but holy SHIT Jacob has a nice freakin' body. My weakness has always been those lower ab muscles that point down to the joy stick :)Taylor has come a long way from "Shark Boy and Lava Girl." So I'm standing in line at the grocery store with

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-4802745600196715572009-06-17T10:38:00.000-07:002009-06-17T11:19:48.518-07:00

I was listening to a program on NPR about the fight against gangs. One guest stated that gangs, in and of themselves, are not bad, it is the activities they undertake that are bad. He says gangs are a part of human nature and that, with the exception of illegal activity, are the same as clubs, teams, families, and clicks. He illustrates the need for human interaction by saying:"If you put 50

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-3383890719671473442009-06-09T17:15:00.000-07:002009-06-09T17:46:11.037-07:00

Have I mentioned before that I hate my in-laws?Oh... twice in the last month you say?Well we might as well make it three.AARRRGGGGHHHH! I hate them soooooo much!(ignore the satisfied customer part... it's hard finding violent pictures that don't cross the line)If they make on more freaking negative comment about our mom works/dad stays home situation it may end in a hospital trip for them and a

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-21696083792455638532009-06-09T12:40:00.000-07:002009-06-09T12:50:13.482-07:00

I seriously love these guys. I can't help but be in a good mood when I hear one of their songs. Birdhouse In My Soul is great and has been made even better with this super well done Literal Video Version. I've watched it 3 times already today... check it out!I think my new favorite lines are..."I command a slo-mo jump""Smoke a pipe and think about Tai Chi""This little dance move threw my back

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-165226026560363182009-06-09T11:55:00.000-07:002009-06-17T11:21:31.912-07:00

KStew has had a traumatic brain injury and has forgotten what decade she's in.Someone please tell the poor girl that it is not in fact 1989, and she is not in fact in 8th grade. UNTIE the shirt!!! And just so you know... calling them skinny jeans does not fool me into not recognizing those hideous pants for what they really are... tapered legged monstrosities from an era long gone and best left

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-31514783841324660202009-06-08T11:43:00.000-07:002009-06-09T11:55:49.279-07:00

Dear Eye Patch Guy,I like your eye patch. From my seat behind you in church it looks like it might be leather. But that would probably make you sweaty. The band around your head looks like it might be a bit snug. Does it give you a headache? Does it leave an indentation around your face when you take it off? Do you spend a lot of time in the sun? Cause your skin is very worn and weathered.

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-86397533892929452492009-06-05T07:10:00.000-07:002009-06-05T07:16:05.772-07:00

I stopped to get my weekly Friday morning bagel today. Some beeyoch behind me was picking up bagels for her company and paying with a company check. She was asked for her drivers license and made the biggest scene - sighing, eye rolling, stomping out in a huff to her car, coming back in a yelling at the poor kid, blah, blah. It was ridiculous.I wanted to slap her for 2 reasons - 1) people

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-76625366278541118402009-06-04T10:23:00.001-07:002009-06-04T10:47:35.536-07:00

Looking for a way to decrease your self esteem, deplete morale, stomp your hopes and dreams into the dirt? I've got just the thing... join me in todays job market.I am currently employed but in a job I'm tired of and in a town I hate. I've been looking for an out of state job for about 5 months now. There have been a couple face to face interviews, a fair number of phone interviews, and a lot

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-71060379653725799022009-06-02T10:54:00.000-07:002009-06-02T12:02:33.071-07:00

I hate a lot of things. Peas, cats, the smell of skunk, hangnails, Lady Gaga, roaches, people who are overly cheery, Wheaties... you get the idea. But today I especially loath the Mommy Blog. The carefully crafted illusion of pure joy and family perfection induces vomiting faster than a speeding finger down the throat. You know the blogs I'm talking about. They contain "About Me" sections

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-58111102182054260932009-05-30T21:50:00.000-07:002009-05-30T21:58:56.662-07:00

http://www.comcast.net/video/rob-pattinson-s-shirtless-pics/1134899533/Comcast/1135200630/Copy and paste into your browser because I don't know how to do the link.Okay, I will say 3 things:1) A tan wouldn't kill2) What is with the damn chicken pox?3) Who is that bitch hanging off him cause it sure as hell doesn't look like me? WTH?Aside from that, where is my scratching post of a husband when you

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-11830362782552499432009-05-28T14:49:00.000-07:002009-05-28T14:52:57.749-07:00

This post from over at thebloggess.com is worthy of passing along. Seriously this girl is messed up... in the best way of course.----This is like a “What I did over the summer” essay except it’s about giant labias.So the other day my friend (Tracy) was telling me about this documentary he saw about this woman who had a tiny upper body but everything from her waist down was enormous and I was all

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-26803912876155052632009-05-27T15:10:00.000-07:002009-05-27T15:14:32.345-07:00

Religion is a very serious and very personal thing. Part of organized religion is the occasional gathering of followers to glean wisdom from those who's knowledge exceeds our own. If this is your church... I think it's time to start shopping around.- Smarty Pants

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-23684261536956190122009-05-26T09:18:00.000-07:002009-05-26T16:44:06.938-07:00

I logged on to rant and I see Runt beat me to the punch. I will agree that responsibility sucks BIG TIME! And all that other crap fits nicely into the responsibility realm. I'm sorry the new job stuff isn't all sunshine and roses. I'm personally so sick of the whole work crap that I've considered starting my own business. Oh wait, just one problem... I don't have any ideas or any money.

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-43341791993716679572009-05-26T07:29:00.001-07:002009-05-26T07:31:49.824-07:00

Marriage sucks.Family sucks.Job sucks.Responsibility sucks.Being mom sucks.Marriage sucks...oh wait, I already said that one! Well, it deserves to be mentioned twice....and that's all I got to say about that!So, how was your Memrial weekend?-Runt.

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-53016039022198845292009-05-21T11:20:00.000-07:002009-05-26T16:44:23.032-07:00

I think a drug deal just went down in the office next to me. Some freaking looking dude comes in and goes into Jay's office. Dude- "that'll be $175"roll of cash is exchanged for paper lunch sackJay- "it's good right?"Dude- "ya, I'll have the rest for you next week"Um what?! It's obvious Jay is under the influence of something on a regular basis but can't she at least conduct her business on the

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-87340486437989406972009-05-21T08:38:00.000-07:002009-05-21T08:46:31.540-07:00

Last night I totally stood up a bunch of friends I grew up with...on purpose. One is a perfect Mormon girl, one ended up as a stripper in Vegas married to a drug addict who killed himself, and one I never even knew very well to begin with. I couldn't face them because no matter which one I compare myself to I don't measure up or I can't relate. Not only that, I tell myself I don't need to keep

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-59658634626257667172009-05-21T08:28:00.000-07:002009-05-21T08:36:44.505-07:00

-Runt

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-47233452631431036422009-05-18T16:33:00.000-07:002009-05-18T16:42:35.509-07:00

I think I have made a HUGE mistake! 2 years ago I went back to school, started working in an accounting office, and now have a BS in accounting... and it makes my stomach hurt. Am I just getting nervous because my job hunt is taking so long? Am I just over worked and over tired? Or did I pick the wrong career path and just waste years of my life and tens of thousands of dollars?!The thought

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-31114707275074581682009-05-17T11:49:00.000-07:002009-05-17T12:29:09.821-07:00

My soon to be 7 year old daughter is the most trying thing I face. Of course I love her and she is wonderful in a lot of ways BUT she drive me to insanity like no one else. Whining- good crap that girl can whine. It can be triggered by anything: hunger, clothes, teeth brushing, mean kids, annoying brother, chores, lack of attention, lack of praise, lack of immediate bending to her will, and most

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-36654458699186711132009-05-16T15:02:00.000-07:002009-05-16T15:21:31.318-07:00

That was quite an introduction...I'm not sure I can live up to that!Yes, I am an Edward / Twilight fan. It's been almost a year now since I became one. Two things have happened to my life since then - First, I have realized I am a sexually depraved middle aged woman who needs some serious help because I now read every romance novel I can get my hands on and read as fast as I can to get to the

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-58769502277886557532009-05-15T08:13:00.000-07:002009-05-15T08:43:13.269-07:00

I'm happy to announce we are adding a second Smarty Pants to the blog. She is hilarious, smart, a lover of Twilight, and my most favorite Internet friend. From now on I will sign all my posts as Smarty Pants and we will let our new friend come up with her own "call sign", till then she's SP2.The blog is still new and searching for its rhythm but I'm loving having a place to blab about stuff that

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-36702385563550776642009-05-14T14:28:00.000-07:002009-05-14T14:39:25.291-07:00

Well hello there Edward... oh, I mean Robert. I think I see a tiny bit of your tummy. Better take your shirt off so I can be sure :)

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-18292001181509286072009-05-14T13:40:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.205-07:00

I was so happy with how amazing the new Star Trek movie turned out. The actors were amazing, the special effects were great, the story was interesting and plausible within the ST realm, and I laughed out loud several times. Star Trek can now be for everyone... not just hard core Trekies. My favorite things...- Kirk got the crap beat out of him a lot- Scotty was freaking hilarious- The Romulan

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-14082821645655808312009-05-14T13:36:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.206-07:00

"Oh son/brother, if your wife ever dies we have the perfect girl for you! Her name is Sally and she is so funny and the nicest thing! She is just like one of us sisters. We've told her all about you and she really wants to meet you."WHAT THE HELL!!!! I'm saying it right now... you push me to hard and I refuse to be held responsible for the backlash coming your way!

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-59104040482693992242009-05-07T10:54:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.206-07:00

My littlest guy is fast approaching his 6 month mark. It's amazing how quickly time passes. Part of me wishes he could stay a baby forever, I just want to hold him and never let go. I've been thinking a lot about his birth and the birth of my other kids. 3 deliveries, 3 completely different experiences, same great outcome.Pregnancy is a lot like an engagement and planning a wedding. You get

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-43217721434914122742009-05-07T09:43:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.206-07:00

There are some things in life I would be happy to do without. In-Laws are at the top of my list. I'll spare you the unpleasant details of our history, but you'd think by now they'd be tired of it all. I'm sure in the beginning attempted sabotage of our relationship was fun and exciting. Bribes, lies, manipulations, interventions, intimidation, threats... woohoo let the good times roll. I

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-24839591615507910872009-05-04T09:06:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.206-07:00

A lot can be learned from listening to the painful commentary on the Twilight DVD.1. Catherine Hardwicke is one of the most annoying people of all time. Catherine is 54 years old but tries to speak like the young actors she works with. You'd think that could be endearing, that she is young at heart and all that junk, but no. It just comes off as unprofessional and painfully annoying.2.

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-57438424830538578722009-04-28T10:44:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.206-07:00

I was hesitant to read the Twilight books.  Teenage vampire love just sounded a bit too silly for me.  It wasn't till a friend forced the books into my hands that I caved.  Boy am I glad I did.  I completely love how the story sucks you in and in the world created by Stephanie Meyer you completely believe it is all possible.  I love the Bella and Edward relationship but my favorite character is

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-29807068970492802462009-04-20T16:15:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.207-07:00

Do you remember when you first decided you were fat?  I do.  I was in 7th grade.  I'd just had yet another growth spurt and reached what I deemed "freakish height".  5 foot 8 inches doesn't seem so bad now but at 13 I was taller than every boy in school and taller than all my teachers.  I spent a lot of time slouching and generally trying to appear shorter.  There was one girl my same height and

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-29106523728655569022009-04-17T10:28:00.001-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.207-07:00

I promise to lay off the whole Jane Austen thing after this. I just wanted to quickly share the latest P&P adaptation...PRIDE and PREJUDICE and ZOMBIESCan't wait to read it!

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-40604948654569305902009-04-16T15:03:00.000-07:002009-04-16T16:07:09.747-07:00

Elizabeth Bennet is my all time favorite female literary character.  She is strong willed, witty, sarcastic, stubborn, compassionate, adventurous,  loyal, and a realist.  Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice is a book that I read at least once a year.  And ever time I read I stay up late to finish it because I just can't stand to put it down.  Before I was introduced to the book, my sister and I

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8019417641407075462.post-12024108730837768272009-04-16T12:20:00.000-07:002009-05-14T13:49:36.210-07:00

Welcome to Smarty Pants Like Me!

Smarty Pantshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17887949195501113652noreply@blogger.com0